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Star Trek:

WINNER:
"Of course the pot will beat you in a staring contest, idiot! It
doesnt have eyes!"

OTHERS:
"I am NOT signing this marriage certificate!"
"This is my clone, Tiberius Kirk....  And you thought Voyager was the only one to steal plots...."
"All this 'prayers before eating' stuff gets on my nerves."

Star Wars:
 

WINNER:
"Peace, love, and lots of sedative! That's my secret to a happy
life!"

OTHERS:
"He got you pregnant with THAT??"
"I told you I'll be on TV, Mum!"
"Why do you keep touching me in my special place?  I told you we're
related.  What happened on Hoth was an isolated incident!!"
 

WINNER:
"This urine sample doesn't look clean; go give another!"

OTHERS:
"I hope this time the hair will grow in the right place..."
"...and then he made me have 4 drinks of something called 'Tequilla.'
This is a primitive culture!"
"Never let a Narn order the wine!"